MIKETRON BLOG

So a poll last week in the Sydney Morning Herald demonstrates that most people in NSW now think Schapelle Corby probably did try to smuggle drugs into Bali.

This is in contrast to the "public outrage" over her arrest and trial in 2005, not to mention the calls to boycott all tourism to Bali, the threats made toward Indonesians in Australia, and the widespread condemnation of the Indonesian Justice System as "primitive and corrupt".

We're certain that it had nothing to do with the Channel 9 documentary, Schappelle Corby: The Hidden Truth (about her eyebrows), which aired last week.
Australian's couldn't possibly be swayed on such passionate, heartfelt issues simply by watching a comedic tabloid "infomentary". Of course they couldn't.

Now that there's an overwhelming will to let Schapelle rot in a Third World Prison, we're certain that Australians everywhere will now start pushing for formal apologies to the Indonesian Government and Justice System, and that a conscious effort will be made to increase Bali's tourism on our part…
And of course we've learnt the lesson to never let the tabloid press control our informed, intelligent opinions again.

Ray Martin for PM!

For the seventh year in a row Channel 10 has rolled out the digital lobotomy of the airwaves that is Big Brother. Worried about the falling ratings and increased brain activity of former audience members, the "youth network" has brought the series back with a sure-to-be-talked-about twist - all of the contestants will be members of the Corby family or related to them by underworld drug connections. Usually casting the show costs a lot of time and money for the station, who's recruiters scour the seediest Gold Coast dives to find yobs and molls of a low enough education standard and moral fibre to actually want to be on the show. But not this year. In a brilliant and economically savvy decision by a Channel 10 marketing genius, this year they have just decided to throw money on the ground in front of the Corby family and film the ensuing moll-fight.

Shown above are the first contestants to enter the house. This year turkey-slapping will be compulsory, along with the consumption of illegal drugs and boogie boarding.

More blogs about Schapelle Corby - Big Brother - Gold Coast.

Australia's most famous drug trafficker has plucked her way back into our hearts. We really love our drug smugglers here, and also like to condescend the Indonesian justice system whenever possible, but Schapelle has taken matters into her own hands by shifting her eyebrows more than THREE QUARTERS OF THE WAY UP HER FOREHEAD! With the obvious effect of endearing her further to the bosom of the Australian Media Toilet, Corby's eyebrows have truly shown themselves to be real Australian heroes. While Prime Minister John Howard was reluctant to give praise directly to the heaven-sent eyebrows (he does technically still possess the most powerful eyebrows in Australia), he did go so far as to say that every Australian would like to see the eyebrows come home to complete their sentence under a prisoner exchange program with Indonesia.

Shown above are the beloved eyebrows, clearly trying to emancipate themselves from the tyranny of the Gold Coast beautician's forehead.

More blogs about Schapelle Corby - Eyebrows - Guilt.